April 2010 Archives

Quote of the day from Toro Rosso tech chief Giorgio Ascanelli. Asked if his team was developing an f-duct like all the other teams (except Virgin, HRT and Lotus) he replied: "If I have ten euros and am hungry, I would buy two sandwiches instead of three grams of caviar."

I have a bit of 'previous' with the volcano in Iceland because when it first erupted on March 20 I was in the first plane that was diverted from nearby Keflavik Airport. I and my fellow crew - six of us - were on a record-breaking mission. We had to turn around and go back to Canada. The volcano cost us five hours.

 

So I considered my journey from Shanghai home to Paris, as the ash cloud hung over Europe and continental airports remained closed, to be Round Two.

 

Someone did mention to me that I'm the only person he knows with a volcanic nemesis.

 

Many of my colleagues embarked on circuitous routes home. Others camped out in Shanghai waiting for air travel to resume normal service. A chum at Red Bull Racing commented that "Milton Keynes has never felt so dearly missed."

 

I worked through the night on Sunday from my hotel room to the extent I never got to bed - which was a shame because the beds at Le Royal Meridien are unspeakably comfy. I had hoped to go and see my mate DJ Erok perform at the F1 after party at M1NT but didn't finish filing stories until 5:30am. Then I sat down to research how I'd get to Hangzhou airport.

 

You'll remember from my previous post 'In Transit' the hellish three hour journey I endured getting from there to Shanghai, so I was paranoid about missing my 2pm flight. The concierge at my hotel explained I had three options: 8:15am bus, 9:30am train or a cab, which would cost between 100 and 150 Euros.

 

I really wanted to sleep but the danger was, if I did, I would miss the flight so I took the early bus option. I didn't know where the bus station was and ended up being an hour early so I caught some shut-eye in the shelter, then more on the public bus all the way to the airport.

 

My flight was packed with Lotus team personnel and, as I had blagged myself seat 1A in first class, I was sat directly in front of Heikki Kovalainen. It was an AirAsia flight bound for Kuala Lumpur, which was outfitted with flatbed seats. I'd never used a full flatbed before! I slept the whole way.

 

This flight was all part of my original itinerary, as was a night at the KLIA's Pan Pacific hotel. What was uncertain, though, was whether my Emirates flight to Paris via Dubai would take off. Would they let me on as far as Dubai if Paris was closed? I had my doubts, and when I went to bed CDG was still shut.

 

This morning I went to the ticket desk at KLIA without my bag expecting them to say it was all off, but in fact it turned out to be fine, so I bolted back to the Pan Pac, stuffed my bag, and within an hour was sat on the plane.

 

I was still shattered from the other day and the hostess saw me yawn so she moved me to an empty row of four so I could spread out and sleep. It was really nice of her - I love Emirates!

 

In Dubai there was just enough time to nip into the lounge and wolf down some champagne and Irish stew before boarding the next flight. These millions of air miles I've accrued sometimes have their perks.

 

I landed in Paris at 9:30pm. I believe I may have been the first of the Paris-based gang to make it home, and I heard from colleagues at the BBC that they were a little behind on their London-bound trip, having landed in Nice and Frankfurt and driven home.

 

It was an unofficial race between us and I think I made pretty good time. I'll ask around and see where I ranked - I reckon I was on the podium. No doubt there are others still stuck out there in China. Poor buggers.

 

Tonight I'll get to sleep in my own bed for the first time in five weeks. But first a few cocktails at Le Fumoir, I think, to toast an epic - and lucky - race to the finish line.

Statues of Bernie Ecclestone and the six former winners of the Chinese Grand Prix were unveiled at this weekend's race.

China's deference for authority was illustrated by the fact that, while each of the driver statues is 1.7 meters tall, Ecclestone's is 1.9 meters in height. That is genuinely larger than life in Ecclestone's case. His actual height is 1.59 meters.

The former winners are memorialized are Vettel, Hamilton, Raikkonen, Schumacher, Alonso and Barrichello.

Jenson Button should take up roulette, because when it comes to gambling he's a natural winner. For the second time this season - as he did in Australia - he made a different tyre choice to the front-runners, and was promoted to the lead.

The Chinese Grand Prix was frantic thanks to intermittent rain. On lap two, most cars poured into the pitlane for intermediate tyres, while Jenson stayed out. Three laps later, Button's strategy was proved correct as the drivers on inters struggled on the drying track and had to come in again.

"Staying out on the dries was the right thing," said Button. "You wouldn't know it at some corners - every corner was an adventure". The reigning champion had been fifth on the grid, and was now staring at victory - one he would hail as the best of his nine career wins.

"For me, this is my best victory because the conditions were so tough," he said, having slid off the circuit once and then struggled to get heat into his tyres as team mate Lewis Hamilton caught up. "I had my heart in my mouth while I was trying to keep the thing on the road."

It was Jenson himself who made the initial call to stay on slicks, while the decision to change to intermediates on lap 38 was McLaren's. "I was thinking of staying out again and they made the right call there: one all."

Fernando Alonso came into the pits three times in the first six laps, once for a drive through penalty. The Ferrari driver jump-started from third on the grid, passing the Red Bulls of Sebastian Vettel and Mark Webber, before taking his punishment.

For Hamilton, it was all action. Unlike the other McLaren driver, he made the wrong tyre call on lap two and banged wheels with Vettel in the pits, earning both drivers a reprimand.

He also fought wheel-to-wheel with Michael Schumacher for the first time in his career, the two jousting for position in the midpoint of the race. "It took ages to get past him," said Lewis, smiling.

Hamilton followed Button home to give McLaren their first one-two in 43 races - the last being the 2007 Italian Grand Prix. Nico Rosberg managed to outshine fellow Mercedes' racer Schumacher once again. The seven times champion was struggling for grip throughout, and finished tenth.

Rosberg took his second podium in succession, having made the same tyre call as Button and led until lap 19. "I was struggling with tyre deg in the wet, so Button got past."

Favourites Sebastian Vettel and Mark Webber will be disappointed with their respective hauls of sixth and eighth place. The title chase is incredibly close, with Button now in the lead.

Sebastian Vettel is on pole position, but there's only one story here: How are we going to get home?

Shanghai has it's good points, but it's also one of those races that poses some cultural headaches. You either love it or hate it, I suppose, and the majority of people can't wait to get out of here.

The ash cloud is going to mess with everyone's plans and, just like all those thousands of people camped out at Heathrow, Frankfurt, Charles de Gaulle etc, we have no idea when the skies will be open again.

I suppose I'm lucky that getting home isn't a life or death issue for me. But there are others here who are up against it: One journalist is meant to be getting married next weekend while the wife one of my photographer chums is about too give birth any day now.

Some are planning to stay, some are trying to get to Dubai and the States. The Lotus Racing team are all off to Malaysia.

There's been talk of the Trans-Siberian Railway, and I'm told there's one economy-class seat going on American Airlines for 8,000 Euros. I wonder if a small grey-haired gentleman will buy it. "Chicken or fish, sir?" "Oh, f**k off!"

Christian Horner pointed out that we used to have the Paris-Beijing race 100 years ago. Now that's an idea.

I was just down at Lotus talking aero with Mike Gascoyne, and when we got up to leave we found ourselves surrounded by F1 VIPs. "I was wondering why we had so many guests, and then I remember our team owner has his own airline," he said, pointing out that one of the perks of his job is that he's leaving for Kuala Lumpur tonight on AirAsia, on seat 01A.

Mike likes his seat 01A, as all VIPs do, and so I pointed out that I'm flying AirAsia to KL tomorrow, and am booked in seat 01A. "Maybe I'll have to fight for it, though," I joked. Mike looked at the F1 heavyweight, then back at me and laughed, "you've got no chance mate."

Pre-race preparations taken care of: king prawn and scallops with a curry sauce, mushroom fettuccine, and bread and butter pudding with lemon sorbet, courtesy of Lotus.

Now I'm off to the grid. I predict Vettel, Alonso, Webber if it's dry, and Webber, Vettel, Alonso if it's wet. Mark's got a wet set-up, see.

I've arrived in Shanghai a couple of days later than usual, because it was my birthday on Wednesday and I quite fancied spending it at the lux place I was staying in Thailand, Sri Panwa. The trip to Shanghai would be an all-dayer, and that's no way to spend one's 29th.

I left for Phuket airport at 6am Thursday morning, having only had 2.5hrs sleep. The MD of the hotel and I are old school chums, and share the same date of birth, so we had quite a decadent party in Sri Panwa's private nightclub.

My driver to the airport called himself "Mr Big". I had a connecting flight in Kuala Lumpur, but frustratingly they were seven hours apart. Not much to do in KL's LCCT for that length of time.

I counted myself lucky I wasn't on the KL-Stansted flight, though, which was suffering an indefinite delay when I left due to the volcanic ash cloud that's emanated from Iceland, grounding all northern European flights.

It was quite chilly on the plane to Shanghai, so sleep was difficult. And the other major problem, which is the focus of this post, is that it wasn't really going to Shanghai. It was going to a place called Hangzhou, which is a city over 200km from Shanghai.

I only really realized this a couple of days before my flight, but had done some online research. There were, to my mind, two options: The first was to get a coach all the way, which was inexpensive but took 3.5hrs. The other was to take a taxi to Hangzhou railway station, and get the bullet train to Shanghai. A slightly more expensive option but, on paper, 1.5hrs faster.

I went for option two, and flagged a cab at the airport. It's always a bit of a concern in China whether the driver has any idea where he's taking you, so I had the station name written on a piece of paper in Chinese. I got in the front of the taxi - always advisable as they never have seat belts in the back.

The cab driver picked up his sister or girlfriend or something on the way there, and they yelled into their phones all the way. When we got to the station 40 minutes later, it wasn't very obvious where I should go. It was 11:30pm at this stage, by the way.

Everyone was wearing these big military-style green greatcoats, because it was 8 degrees. Not expecting it to be this cold, I only had a thin waterproof for warmth.

All the signs and timetables were written in Chinese and no one spoke a word of English. There was one train at 11:37pm and the next 01:37am. I don't know whether either were Shanghai-bound but I do know the queue for tickets was 15 minute deep and I didn't fancy hanging out there for two hours. So I approached some cabbies.

They said Shanghai was two hours away by cab (could be worse) and that the journey would cost me 80 Euros. I beat one down to 45.

So we set off - again with great uncertainty as we didn't share a word of each other's language. After ten minutes he pulled off the road by a hawker stand next to the highway where there were a dozen people hanging out - the driver's mates. They looked a pretty thuggish lot. No explanation was given for the stop, so I was getting rather concerned, clutching my laptop bag tightly and wondering whether I should make a bolt for it.

It became clear the taxi driver was handing me over to one of his mates, who had a plain car - a 4x4. The thuggish-looking gang gathered around and asked for my 450RMB upfront, rather than giving it to the driver on arrival. My spider senses were way up at this point but the driver, a thirty-ish chap who looked more trustworthy than the others, nodded this was correct. They then split the money up between them, the driver getting the smallest cut.

Then three young people jumped in the back of the jeep - my 45 Euros hadn't bought me exclusivity.

At least the driver got me to downtown Shanghai though, at 2am. He turned out to be a fast and relatively decent driver. It had been a very long day, and I was already dreading waking early and going to work in the morning...

Formula One has been quiet recently, as factories gear up aero upgrades and drivers relax on the beaches of South East Asia ahead of Sunday's Chinese Grand Prix.

I spotted Nico Rosberg at Thailand's exclusive island hotel, The Racha, earlier this week where the 'blond bombshell' was kicking back with his girlfriend. The tranquility was broken, though, when an enormous monitor lizard - a prehistoric-looking thing - started helping itself to the seafood buffet. I would suggest that three races into his tenure at Mercedes, alongside Michael Schumacher, Nico is used to dealing with cold-blooded beasts from another era.

Michael has been roundly beaten by the 24 year-old three for three, but if it's getting to him, he isn't showing it. He's as chirpy as I've ever seen him, insisting "everything is going according to plan". His record in Shanghai is pitchy. One win, but also a mare of a race in 2005 which saw him crash on his installation lap, before the race had even begun.

Perhaps it's just we, the observers, who are worried about Michael's legacy. Nevertheless, I have always maintained that once we're back in Europe in a month's time, Schumi will rediscover his groove.

The man poised to take victory in China, though, is another German... Sebastian Vettel. His record here is exemplary. Fourth place with Toro Rosso (no mean feat) in 2008, a spectacular wet win last year, and this time he arrives with the fastest car off the back of his first victory of the season. It will take a lot to stop him.

Mark Webber has the same car, but does he have the split-second aggression of his younger rival? On the right day, yes he does. Fernando Alonso and Felipe Massa too have the skills to match Vettel, and their Ferrari is just a couple of tenths off. So a superior strategy and no errors could give the Scuderia its second victory of the year.

It easy to forget, after their strategy blunder in Malaysian qualifying and Alonso's technical issues in the race, that Ferrari are leading the title chase. Red Bull Racing's woeful reliability at the first two rounds, and McLaren's quali dramas at Sepang (where, like Ferrari, they forecast the rain incorrectly) have allowed Ferrari not to lose too much ground.

But the Italian team will be under pressure this weekend to perform and show how much pace they have comparative to Red Bull.

Ferrari were catching Vettel's Red Bull in Bahrain before the German suffered engine troubles which dropped him to fourth. In Australia, Fernando Alonso had to play catch-up after a first lap spin, but his qualifying time was only 16/100ths off Vettel's pole. In Malaysia, the Spaniard's fastest race lap was only 0.177 seconds off Mark Webber's best, despite having a gearbox problem. So the Scuderia have very respectable pace.

McLaren, too, could be in contention this weekend for Shanghai's long straights will give them a chance to make very good use of their 'F-duct' system. What's more, Lewis Hamilton dominated practice at Sepang before a bad strategy call in qualifying put him out of contention for the race.

It could be neck-and-neck between these three teams and their drivers in Shanghai, and those long straights should give us some overtaking too.

Revelations of Michelin's proposal to Formula One's powerbrokers makes me smile. The message is Michelin are only interested in returning to F1 if there's open competition between tyre manufacturers - but that the tyre regulations must more or less mirror exactly what Michelin are already producing for Le Mans. Fair competition? Well, if this bill is passed, more power to them.

Michelin has stipulated that if it is to supply tyres to teams the specifications must increase from 13 inch to 18 inch, like their low-profile sports car endurance tyres.

The advantages will be largely green: fewer tyres, lower manufacturing costs, greater longevity. Low-profile tyres will also have more in common with the tyres the audiences at home buy for their Mondeos. They're much more road-relevant, and there's potentially some development synergy there.

There will be a positive impact on safety, because a low-profile tyre won't bounce as far if it's ripped from its wheel tethers. They'll come up to temperature quicker, too, so no need for tyre warmers.

There's also the comedic value that cars with oversized wheels will look like those Max Power cartoons which is, to my mind, a big plus.

But the disadvantages cannot be ignored, and for these reasons I cannot see teams or the FIA agreeing to them.

Firstly, the cars will need to be completely redesigned. The bigger wheels will affect aerodynamics, suspension and put greater strain on gearboxes. We're talking a blank sheet of paper here, the costs of which would be enormous. This, at a time when most teams, the FIA, and the world at large are banging the cost-cutting drum.

Secondly, the turbulence these bigger wheels will cause will be incredible on an open-wheel car, and at a time when we're looking at ways to reduce dirty air and improve overtaking by, for example, banning diffusers next year, to consider bigger wheels is madness.

Thirdly, I understand that in addition to these technical stipulations, Michelin also want paying for the tyres and free track signage at races. Bernie has told the teams the value of this track signage will, if the teams agree to Michelin's proposals, be deducted from the end of year TV revenue share.

Who's going to agree to that when Bridgestone, for a fee (probably not so different, overall), will carry on supplying this year's spec tyres.

And this isn't meant to sound like a criticism of Michelin, who have such a rich history in motorsport, but I think we have to question the French company's commitment when everything has to be on their terms. If they're not willing to compromise, do they really care enough?

F1 is a fantastic marketing opportunity for any tyre manufacturer and while Bridgestone feel they've got the maximum value out of it that they can, Hankook, for example, could get in on the act and raise their international profile. Obviously if they were to offer a similar-spec tyre to the current one gratis, that would be very attractive.

The trouble is that it's all happened a bit late in the day. Tyres are the single biggest performance variable, and F1 needs consistent, reliable source of rubber.  Tyre development starts even earlier than the design of a new F1 car. It would have to be signed off at board-level and a whole factory would have to be readied. If Hankook were serious about coming in we'd have been getting press releases to that effect at Christmas. Instead all we get are murmurings and non-confirmations.

Kumho and Goodyear are both in financial dire straits. Continental's marketing is geared more to safety than competition. If Michelin were to come in with a Le Mans-type tyre, there's a fair chance they would be joined by Hankook and Dunlop, who also run at Le Mans. It would be very cost-effective for them.

But not for Formula One it wouldn't. And for that reason, the teams would be well advised to draw a line underneath it and re-sign with Bridgestone until another tyre manufacturer puts in a more attractive bid for their business.

For Sebastian Vettel, the world championship has just started. His Red Bull team gave a sigh of relief on the Sepang pitwall, as their cars crossed the line first and second to take maximum points away from the Malaysian Grand Prix.

"About bloody time!" shouted one engineer as he was hugged by another.

The season's opening rounds did not reward them with the results the car deserved. Vettel had suffered two technical failures in as many races, both ridding him of wins. But he fulfilled his promise on Sunday, taking the lead through Turn 1 and holding it to the flag.

He made it look easy, but there was nothing comfortable about the 36 degree heat. "I didn't stop sweating," admitted the German. Still, he looked cool.

Team mate Mark "poker face" Webber, as Seb has taken to calling him, started from pole but spun his wheels at the start, which was all third placed Vettel needed to sneak up the inside and take position. "If Mark had been in my position he'd have done the same," noted Vettel. Team principal Christian Horner told them both on the grid: "Boys, behave yourselves!" and they did, Webber challenging through turns two and three but giving his team mate enough room and finally backing off.

At wet qualifying session had shaken up the grid, with both Ferraris and McLarens failing to make Q2. Lewis Hamilton had the best start, shooting from 20th to 12th on the run down to the first corner. He eventually finished sixth, behind Adrian Sutil who put in an impressive performance for Force India.

Nico Rosberg took Mercedes first podium, having started second, and Robert Kubica got the most out of his Renault to take fourth. Michael Schumacher slowed to a halt on lap 10 after a wheel nut worked loose. Perhaps the biggest loser was Fernando Alonso who drove doggedly all afternoon with a downshift problem, and was fighting Hamilton on the penultimate lap when his V8 lunched itself and the Ferrari expired in a cloud of white smoke.

Felipe Massa, who finished seventh, now leads the championship by two points, from Alonso and Vettel.

Such is the superiority of Red Bull's speed, we could now see Vettel run away with this title. "The championship's over, isn't it?" joked Webber in the post-race press conference. But their Achilles Heel is reliability, and we've still yet to see Red Bull take on McLaren and Ferrari in a straight fight. The title battle is brewing nicely, and China, in two week's time, may provide another interesting infusion.

... That's the question. People often talk about having sprinkler systems at race tracks, to make the race more exciting and unpredictable. Well, scheduling a race at 4pm in Malaysia is like having a sprinkler system with a timer. Trouble is, the shower head's the size of a dustbin lid and it can get a bit too much.

Rain affected qualifying yesterday, bringing out the red flags in Q3. There were some high-priced scalps. Felipe Massa is 21st. Lewis Hamilton is 20th, and joked afterwards this was typical of his recent luck. Fernando Alonso is 19th. Jenson Button is 17th, having beached his McLaren in the gravel.

Lotus were thrilled to get Heikki Kovalainen's car into Q2. In 15th, he's ahead of both Ferraris and McLarens.

Michael Schumacher may have to hand back his 'rainmeister' badge, because he was 1.1 seconds off team mate Nico Rosberg at the end of Q3. Schumi is eighth, Sebastian Vettel is third, Rosberg is second and Mark Webber, who took a gamble on inters, pile-drove pole by a gaping 1.3 seconds.

It will rain today. But how early in the race? Generally it's been falling at 5pm, so potentially 30 minutes before the end. Because it rains so hard, it's a question of the drivers hanging on before the reds come out.

Difficult to predict, therefore. But Red Bull are looking good.

I caught a coach downtown last night with a couple of team principals - Franz Tost and Eric Boullier - and the Force India drivers. We were en route to the Grand Prix Gala, and annual cocktail, dinner and concert which is hosted by the King of Malaysia and the Prime Minister.

Our bus, which left the Pan Pacific out at the airport, took no time at all to get to the KL Convention Centre, in the shadow of the Petronas Twin Towers, because we had our own motorcycle outriders.

Police escorts are always fun, but doing it in a bus - rather than a limo - is a bit odd. Like the bus is carrying maximum-security convicts, or has a bomb strapped to the bottom.

We were ushered into the ballroom with mountains of buffet food. Bernie was there with girlfriend Fabiana Flossi, plus Massa, Fisichella and Heidfeld.



I was scoffing some Atlantic cod with mashed potato when Adam Parr said "come on Adam we've got to go meet the king". "Er okay, let me just finish this delicious..." but there wasn't time. He, Franz Tost and I bolted out of the room.

The drivers had gone on ahead of us so we weren't to sure where we were going... And I wasn't sure I was invited to meet the king anyway.  Adam asked  me "you know where you're going right?" and I admitted "No idea, I'm just here for the free food and drink".

We walked into another room, but it wasn't the King's reception. In fact, we'd walked into a Lionel Richie concert.



I stayed for a few songs, but Adam and Franz turned around and ran back, keen to shake hands with the monarch. But I think they were too late.  I think they came all that way just for that...  Like I said, my priorities were elsewhere!

Good response so far to my request for Malaysia predictions. The person who gets closest to the top ten race finishers, based on points, will win a copy of my new book, the TOTAL Grand Prix Travel Guide.

Entries close at 16:00 Malaysia time today - i.e When the lights go green for qualifying.

Good luck.

It's great to be back in South East Asia as I love this part of the world. The downside is that, in the Sepang paddock, it's either so baking hot one sweats profusely, or we have monsoon showers. Either way, it would pay to have windscreen wipers bolted to your face.

I stayed in Melbourne for a couple of extra days before flying to KL very early Wednesday morning. Sunday night and Monday afternoon was spent solidly working in my hotel room, while finally on Tuesday I managed to break out and catch up with some Aussie mates - we went to see Arj Barker (of Flight of the Conchords fame) perform at the huge Melbourne Comedy Festival.

Getting to KL was very pleasurable because, for the first time in my entire life (and given I've taken approximately 360 flights in the last six years, this is pretty amazing...) I was given a complimentary upgrade to business class. So thanks Emirates.

I'm staying in downtown KL, and there are very few people from the paddock here. Everyone's outside the city. My hotel is right in front of the Twin Towers, so the location couldn't be better, but because I'm on my lonesome things have been a bit quiet.

Tonight, though, is the F1 gala dinner... and it's right next door to where I'm staying. Handy.

Current talk in the paddock is about the return of KERS, the return of Michelin, and whether Red Bull Racing are using compressed air to control the ride height of their car.

I'm headed down to Lotus now to do a kind of Mr and Mrs type thing with Jarno Trulli and his race engineer. Big weekend for Lotus!

The double-fronted, palm tree-like grandstand provides an awesome backdrop to a circuit that is one of the most challenging of the year. As well as the physical punishment the drivers receive, due to the stifling 40 degree temperatures, there are several corners which are off-camber, making braking difficult and the perfect racing line a bit of an art.

The circuit's layout of wide straights leading into tight corners has often resulted in collisions. The two long straights provide a great opportunity for the drivers to get a tow, and the generous track width encourages them to take extra chances. The sight of 20-something cars scything through twisty turns 1 and 2, jousting all the way, is always thrilling, while turn 12 is blindingly fast, and the final hairpin the home of the late-braker.


Local start time: 16h00
Number of laps: 56
Circuit length: 5.542km
Race distance: 310.408km
Lap record: Juan Pablo Montoya (Williams, 2004), 1:34.223


LAST TIME OUT: Monsoon rain lashed down on the Sepang circuit, which brought the race to an abrupt finish after just 32 laps of 56. Because less than three quarters of the race was run, only half points were awarded - meaning Jenson Button extended his championship lead by five points
2009 POLE POSITION: Button
2009 PODIUM: 1) Button 2) Heidfeld 3) Glock

Accommodation: Avillon Port Dickson
Inspired by old world Malay fishing villages, this beach resort has chalets sat on stilts above shallow waters, four poster beds, and open sky bathrooms. Just be careful on the winding roads that lead to it - as the wrecked cars at the bottom of the valley will testify.

Restaurant: Bijan
Food just like mama used to make - if your mum is Malaysian, that is. Bijan offers rustic local dishes that have garnered rave reviews from Malay connoisseurs. But steer clear of the Durian cheesecake - fluffy, light and with a delicious biscuit base, but there is no getting away from the stench.

Bar: Luna
Perched on the rooftop of the Pacific Regency Hotel, 30 floors up, this two-level bar has breathtaking close-up views of the Twin Towers. On the lower deck is a pool which no one dares swim in, and day-beds even when the sun's gone down.  Lotus' third driver Fairuz Fauzy agrees this is the chicest place in KL.

Club: Zouk
A cavernous super club, Zouk - which is Creole for 'party' - draws the biggest crowds and DJs. Outside it looks like a huge boulder, and inside there are booths made out of rock formations around the dance floor. A couple of years back, one well-refreshed test driver - who shall remain nameless - strode into one of these booths, tripped, and landed on a table of champagne flutes. He never admitted to his physio where he got the cuts from.

While you're there: Wander around Chinatown and follow your nose. You can get well fed in KL for £2. Hawker stands clutter both sides of the street, underneath hourly-rate hotels. The satays here are the standard by which all should be judged. Of course, you can't avoid the spectacular Petronas Twin Towers. At 451.9m this is THE symbol of modern South East Asia. It opens at 9am (closed Monday) they issue 1,700 free tickets to go up to the Skybridge each day. However, only 120 people can go up per hour, so you may have to get your ticket and return later. It shuts at 7pm.